Wednesday, January 5, 2011

Countering Stress and Depression

by Dalai Lama on Wednesday, January 5, 2011 at 12:25am



At a fundamental level, as human beings, we are all the same; each one of us aspires to happiness and each one of us does not wish to suffer. This is why, whenever I have the opportunity, I try to draw people's attention to what as members of the human family we have in common and the deeply interconnected nature of our existence and welfare.

Today, there is increasing recognition, as well as a growing body of scientific evidence, that confirms the close connection between our own states of mind and our happiness. On the one hand, many of us live in societies that are very developed materially, yet among us are many people who are not very happy. Just underneath the beautiful surface of affluence there is a kind of mental unrest, leading to frustration, unnecessary quarrels, reliance on drugs or alcohol, and in the worst case, suicide. There is no guarantee that wealth alone can give you the joy or fulfilment that you seek. The same can be said of your friends too. When you are in an intense state of anger or hatred, even a very close friend appears to you as somehow frosty, or cold, distant, and annoying.

However, as human beings we are gifted with this wonderful human intelligence. Besides that, all human beings have the capacity to be very determined and to direct that strong sense of determination in whatever direction they like. So long as we remember that we have this marvellous gift of human intelligence and a capacity to develop determination and use it in positive ways, we will preserve our underlying mental health. Realizing we have this great human potential gives us a fundamental strength. This recognition can act as a mechanism that enables us to deal with any difficulty, no matter what situation we are facing, without losing hope or sinking into feelings of low self-esteem.

I write this as someone who lost his freedom at the age of 16, then lost his country at the age of 24. Consequently, I have lived in exile for more than 50 years during which we Tibetans have dedicated ourselves to keeping the Tibetan identity alive and preserving our culture and values. On most days the news from Tibet is heartbreaking, and yet none of these challenges gives grounds for giving up. One of the approaches that I personally find useful is to cultivate the thought: If the situation or problem is such that it can be remedied, then there is no need to worry about it. In other words, if there is a solution or a way out of the difficulty, you do not need to be overwhelmed by it. The appropriate action is to seek its solution. Then it is clearly more sensible to spend your energy focussing on the solution rather than worrying about the problem. Alternatively, if there is no solution, no possibility of resolution, then there is also no point in being worried about it, because you cannot do anything about it anyway. In that case, the sooner you accept this fact, the easier it will be for you. This formula, of course, implies directly confronting the problem and taking a realistic view. Otherwise you will be unable to find out whether or not there is a resolution to the problem

Taking a realistic view and cultivating a proper motivation can also shield you against feelings of fear and anxiety. If you develop a pure and sincere motivation, if you are motivated by a wish to help on the basis of kindness, compassion, and respect, then you can carry on any kind of work, in any field, and function more effectively with less fear or worry, not being afraid of what others think or whether you ultimately will be successful in reaching your goal. Even if you fail to achieve your goal, you can feel good about having made the effort. But with a bad motivation, people can praise you or you can achieve goals, but you still will not be happy.

Again, we may sometimes feel that our whole lives are unsatisfactory, we feel on the point of being overwhelmed by the difficulties that confront us. This happens to us all in varying degrees from time to time. When this occurs, it is vital that we make every effort to find a way of lifting our spirits. We can do this by recollecting our good fortune. We may, for example, be loved by someone; we may have certain talents; we may have received a good education; we may have our basic needs provided for - food to eat, clothes to wear, somewhere to live - we may have performed certain altruistic deeds in the past. We must take into consideration even the slightest positive aspect of our lives. For if we fail to find some way of uplifting ourselves, there is every danger of sinking further into our sense of powerlessness. This can lead us to believe that we have no capacity for doing good whatsoever. Thus we create the conditions of despair itself.

As a Buddhist monk I have learned that what principally upsets our inner peace is what we call disturbing emotions.  All those thoughts, emotions, and mental events which reflect a negative or uncompassionate state of mind inevitably undermine our experience of inner peace. All our negative thoughts and emotions - such as hatred, anger, pride, lust, greed, envy, and so on - are considered to be sources of difficulty, to be disturbing. Negative thoughts and emotions are what obstruct our most basic aspiration - to be happy and to avoid suffering. When we act under their influence, we become oblivious to the impact our actions have on others: they are thus the cause of our destructive behaviour both toward others and to ourselves. Murder, scandal, and deceit all have their origin in disturbing emotions.

This inevitably gives rise to the question - can we train the mind? There are many methods by which to do this. Among these, in the Buddhist tradition, is a special instruction called mind training, which focuses on cultivating concern for others and turning adversity to advantage. It is this pattern of thought, transforming problems into happiness that has enabled the Tibetan people to maintain their dignity and spirit in the face of great difficulties. Indeed I have found this advice of great practical benefit in my own life.

A great Tibetan teacher of mind training once remarked that one of the mind’s most marvellous qualities is that it can be transformed. I have no doubt that those who attempt to transform their minds, overcome their disturbing emotions and achieve a sense of inner peace, will, over a period of time, notice a change in their mental attitudes and responses to people and events. Their minds will become more disciplined and positive. And I am sure they will find their own sense of happiness grow as they contribute to the greater happiness of others. I offer my prayers that everyone who makes this their goal will be blessed with success.


The Dalai Lama

December 31, 2010

Published in the Hindustan Times, India, on January 3rd, 2011


Sunday, January 2, 2011

11-01-02 Big Kahuna's Parking Lot Sunset

Tonight as I was waiting for a friend to arrive, I was treated to a spectacular sunset that lit the clouds up like a fire in the sky.







Additional points to ponder

 

 

The heart has its reasons which reason does not know.

- Blaise Pascal

 
 
Fall seven times, stand up eight.
- Japanese proverb
 
Holding on to anger, resentment and hurt only gives you tense muscles, a headache and a sore jaw from clenching your teeth.  
Forgiveness gives you back the laughter and the lightness in your life.
 
- Joan Lunden
 
If you don't like something, change it.  
If you can't change it, change your attitude. 
- Dr. Maya Angelou
 
The less you open your heart to others, the more your heart suffers. Go ahead take a chance, Love someone today.
 
The wise wo/man in the storm prays to God, not for safety from danger, but for deliverance from fear. It is the storm within that endangers him/her, not the storm without.
~ Ralph Waldo Emerson
 
There is always some madness in love. But there is also always some reason in madness. 
~ Friedrich Nietzsche
 
The greatest conflicts are not between two people but between one person and himself. 
- Garth Brooks
 
The difference between try and triumph is a little umph. 
- Author Unknown
 
Nobody trips over mountains. 
It is the small pebble that causes you to stumble. 
Pass all the pebbles in your path and you will find you have crossed the mountain. 
- Unknown Author
 
The Universe knows not that you exist, nor, does it care.  
Your fate is undetermined and is what you make of it.  
Laugh, love and care, about all that is around you. 
Revel in the wonderment, it's your one and only chance.
~ Jim Davidson
 
In the sky, there is no distinction of east and west; people create distinctions out of their own minds and then beleive them to be true.
~ Buddha
 
Courage doesn't always roar.  Sometimes courage is the little voice at the end of the day that says, I'll try again tomorrow.

-Mary Anne Radmacher-Hershey
 
Louie: Ignatowski, where have you been all week? 
Reverend Jim: I don't work weekends. 
Louie: You've been gone 9 days! 
Reverend Jim: Yeah. 
Louie: Weekends are only two days. 
Reverend Jim: Oh....I thought we'd switched to the metric system.

If my hands are fully occupied in holding on to something, I can neither give nor receive.
- Dorothee Solle
 
We search so much for the right choices, the right paths to walk, the right time, the right reasons, and the right person.  
But life isn't just about searching for things.  It's also about letting the unexpected happen and finding joy in things and people we never searched for. 
- Anonymous
 
 
Life is change.
Growth is optional.
Choose wisely.
-Unknown
 
If you want to be happy, be.
~ Leo Tolstoy
 
One of the secrets of a long and fruitful life is to forgive everybody everything every night before you go to bed. 
- Bernard Baruch
 
I don't know.   
I don't know why I did it. 
I don't know why I enjoyed it and I don't know why I'll do it again.
Bart Simpson
 
 
If you don't ask for what you want, the answer is already no. Why not ask, and maybe the answer will be YES?
 
The best thing to give to your enemy is forgiveness; to an opponent, tolerance; to a friend, your heart; to your child, a good example; to a father, deference; to your mother, conduct that will make her proud of you; to yourself, respect; to all men, charity.
-Benjamin Franklin
 
Hope ends when you stop believing.  
Friendship ends when you stop sharing.
Love ends when you stop caring.
And life ends when you stop dreaming.

Creativity is allowing yourself to make mistakes.   Art is knowing which ones to keep. 
- Scott Adams
 
As a Rose absorbs the nutrients it feeds on and as it thrives to see the sun as it must to survive...... the Rose becomes more beautiful and in turn will provide sunshine to those who can behold it's beauty.  
Fortunate is the Man who can see the Rose within a Woman.  
Blessed is the man who this Woman holds to be her nutrient, her sunshine.
~ Art Denton
 
If you could only sense how important you are to the lives of those you meet; how important you can be to the people you may never even dream of.  There is something of yourself that you leave at every meeting with another person. 
- Fred Rogers
 
Nobody can go back and start a new beginning, but anyone can start today and make a new ending. 
~ Maria Robinson

What appears to be the end may really be a new beginning.

The secret to a rich life is to have more beginnings than endings. 
~ Dave Weinbaum

Saturday, January 1, 2011

11-01-01 Spitting Cave Sunset/Uncle Bo's

Frank, Holly, Christopher, Emily and I went to Spitting Cave this evening to see if we could get some good shots of the 1st sunset of the new year.  At first we were disappointed because the sky was cloudy and pretty washed out.





Then a group of college student showed up and almost stole the show.  Apparently they are from the University of Wisconsin and are members of the swim and dive team.  The dive team members are amazing.  The highest point they dove from had to be over 50 feet from the water.  This guy is jumping from a lower position.




The green shrubbery on the upper right portion of this picture is the height they were diving from.


Just as we were about to leave, Holly called out for us to take another look at the sunset...







 
Later we met up at Uncle Bo's in Kapahulu for dinner and dessert.



10-12-31 New Years Eve - Tantalus(Round Top Drive)

I spent New Years Eve atop Tantalus taking pictures of the fireworks being shot off to celebration the New Year.  This could well be the last year that one will be able to see this spectacle in Honolulu.  The City has banned the use of all fireworks with the exception of commercial displays and certain religious and traditional ceremonies.

I was treated to 3 separate commercial fireworks shows this evening, that's aside from the illegal aerials.  Hilton Hawaiian Village, City & County & the military.  Couldn't be sure if the military was from Hickam or Pearl Harbor.


Going...

Going...


It's distorted because of all the smoke from the fireworks being shot off.